The Night The Bottle Let Me Down

Hello and Welcome back"

Where the hell have I been is probably what you are all asking. To which I will say LET ME EXPLAIN !!!! My life has taken a brand new turn, a turn in the right direction I may add. So sit back, grab your favorite beverage of choice and join me on an epic adventure of The Night The Bottle Let Me Down

 Picture it , the love shack late August 2011. A crazy redheaded unemployed vet tech with not a cent in her pocket but lots of love in her heart takes a leap of faith. Welcome five adorable orphaned foster kittens at the ripe old age of 2 weeks. Gone are the days of my wild and crazy alcohol infused life, gone also are the days of sitting on my arse watching soap operas. Instead my life became brand new, a sense of purpose, a full time job. I may not get paid money to raise these adorable babies but I get rewarded with milestones, cuddles and the sound of purring that if you close your eyes you would almost swear you were on an african safari and were surrounded by a pride of lions. Of course once you open your eyes you sadly discover you are just in our living room amid chaos, kitten poop and most of all LOVE.

 The babies are now rambunctious 5 1/2 week old kittens, no longer needing bottle feedings every 3 hours, no longer needing maverick the wonder dog to perform operation hiney wipes and sadly for me,,, no longer needing me ,,,, as much. They now eat moist food and can use the litter box and keep me in stitches everyday with their actions. I knew I was smitten for the kittens, when on my 35th birthday I was far more concerned with bottle feeding babies and the thoughts of bottle feeding myself with a healthy dose of fireball never crossed my mind. Two weeks after my birthday I decided that since they slept through the night I could treat myself to a taste of that cinnamon goodness. Once a pro always a pro, or so I thought. Three shots in and I was LOADED !!!! Long gone are the days where I could drink a bottle and still have room for more. I gave it a valiant effort but by 10pm not only was I drunk as a skunk I was also falling asleep. A part of me died that night, where the hell did the party animal go. I went to bed feeling like a rock star and woke up feeling like road kill. The only sense of party animal I have in me now is doing the "potty dance" when the kittens use the litter box. 

 Fireball sales have dramatically dropped in Fredericton, but in all honesty I dont miss it,,, much. One of these days I will get a little hitch in my giddy up , throw caution to the wind and open that bottle of cinnamon goodness with my teeth, the way I used to, back in the good old days when I indeed was a rock star. Just to give you an example of what I looked like before and after becoming a foster mom I thought I would include a few pics, I will let you all be the judge on my rock star status.  This is me ,, the former Fireball Queen

 Here you have the former fireball queen newly reformed into foster mom grand champion.

Sure I look tired, my attire has gone from taking time to find that perfect outfit to wearing pajamas because I never go far and they are comfy and I dont care if they get anything from food to crap on them.Moist cat food now graces my hands and sadly for me my mouth more then fireball has and you know what? I'm happy doing what I do. Seeing those kittens transform from innocent defenseless oprhans blossom into wild eyed adventure seeking 5 1/2 week old kittens is better then any trip I have ever taken with fireball. 

 Not to fear, that crazy, wild always ready for a few shots girl is still here, shes just busy doing more important things for the time being. And I am sure that when the day comes when my little ones are old enough to leave Angels Gather Here, to find their forever home, a Bottle or two of fireball will be needed. After all its not everyday you have to say goodbye to little ones you have cared for , fallen in love with and put all your needs and desires on the back burner for. So yes my friends when that day comes, I will have empty arms, a piece of my heart taken from me and memories that will I will cherish for the rest of my life. Fireball will always be there waiting for that wild and crazy redhead to make her return and the good people at the liquor store will all rejoice in knowing the girl with the taste for fireball is still around. These kittens have made my life feel complete and make me say "I'm so happy I could shit rainbows and fart fairydust. I hope you all can have something in your life give you that same happiness so that you may all be able to say, that you to are so happy you could shit rainbows and fart fairydust.

Confessions Of A Fruity Pebble Addict.

Hello and welcome back:

  I know, I know it's been forever since I last wrote a blog entry, but let me explain.  I have been busy enjoying my break from work, well the work I got paid to do, for now until it gets busy at work again I stay home and do lots of work I may not get paid money for, but the rewards of a nice tidy home, freshly washed, dried and folded with love laundry and the occasional decent meal made by my hands, often times out weigh the job I brought home a decent pay every two weeks, at least I dont have to claim taxes on freshly washed drawers and a clean turlet. But I do have a slight confession to make, so sit back, get comfy and grab your favorite beverage of choice and join me on an epic tale of "confessions of a fruity pebble addict"

 Picture it, Fredericton New Brunswick Canada, roughly 3 weeks ago. It was a beautiful Saturday morning, ok so the weather was rather dismal however, my sunny disposition made it seem like it was a balmy 30 degrees in mid June. You see, Trevor decided that since we had just bought a brand new 2010 Dodge Avenger, and we had fresh off the presses, brand new passports we should make a quick dash across the border into the Great U S of A . I was so happy I could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust. I could barely sleep Friday night, and with saying that Im sure I kept Trevor up a good part of the night as well. But non the less we arose early that Saturday morning, had a cup of coffee, grabbed a shower and jumped into our car, did I mention its a brand new 2010 Dodge Avenger???  

 From Fredericton NB to Houlton Maine, its only about an hour and a half away, we talked, sipped away on our drinks, bottled water for me, caffeine free coke for Trevor, we laughed, talked about work, the kids, commented on vehicals that were nice, but not as nice as our new baby, and sang away to songs on the radio, let me clairify, I sang, Trevor did his best not to take his hands off the wheel to plug his ears.  Finally we get to the border, there was a bit of a line up, but nothing and I mean nothing was getting me down, no siree, this little redhead was on a mission.  As we get closer to the guard, a bright light flashes, IM BLIND, no wait Ive regained my vision only to see the biggest african american man I have ever seen in my life standing there. Come to find out they take your picture as you near the border guard, a sign stating that may have been nice. 

This very large black man is standing there with his hand very near his side, by his side I may mention is a gun, he peers into our car and says" wheres ya all goin? To Houlton sir we reply, he takes our passports and seems very happy that I have them already for him, I guess it does pay to be organized. He then asks, wheres ya all from, Trevor replies Im from Moncton, I then squeak out, Im from Fredericton, he asks how long we will be over there, oh only a few hours my chauffer replies, and then the man squats down so he can actually look at us, gives us a wink and says "Y'all have a nice time" Im thinking to myself,dear jesus did we take a wrong turn, are we now headed to the deep south, I later find out that some people in the states just sound rather southern even though they are a mere hour and a half from us in Fredericton New Brunswick Canada. I could have listened to that man talk all day, however I was on a misson. It took all my strength not to tell Trevor to "GIVE ER" and peel on out of there unto my destination.

 Oh my I was shaking with anticipation, I had to piss like a racehorse but didnt want to take the time, I was hungry but didnt want to cave into my growling belly, Trevor however had other plans, pee first, then eat. Goddamnit all to hell I explode, what if they are all gone before we get there, Oh wise one pats me on the head and reassures me that he is sure they will have plenty. I say to myself, well if they dont WE WILL go to every store until we find them. Self replies, Trevor help me I think shes lost it.  By now my bladder is relieved, and my belly is full of 2 pieces of kentucky fried chicken, the extra crispy kind, because you cant get it that way in CANADA, can we go yet I ask, Trevor sighed and pushed away the last mouthful of green beans and said yessssssssssss. WHOOPPIEEE I rejoice.

 Oh Boy I yell as I run to the car, or what I thought was our car, give me a break we had only had it one day , so I mistook a ford for a dodge, shoot me. Trev then went on to tell me when I get confused, look for the temporary license plate sticker on my side of the windshield, point taken, its bright orange how could I have ever missed it. From KFC we go to a store called Mardens, their commercial says, shoulda bought it when I saw it at mardenssssssssssss, the 5 minute drive there I sang that song about 5 times, even going through the store I was humming it, the whole while willing Trev to just scan not stop and give full inspection on every little artical. I did buy a few things there, a 12 pack of legal pads for $3.99, for note taking I told him, a stock pot for $8, for making homemade soup was my reply, and a bra for 50 cents, my response to that was if they dont hold the girls in, I will suspend it from the tree one cup can be filled with bird seed, the other cup full of water, always the animal welfare activist. The birds will say, look Ethel the cup really does runnith over.

 Praise be Jesus, we are finally out of Mardens and onto my destination, when I yelled, I should have bought it when I saw it at mardens, they had a 24 pack of bic pens for $5, Trevor said I figured you would knowing you have an obsessive compulsion for pens, my reply was , more money left to buy what I came for, and now my friends you are about to find out what it was that had my knickers in a twist. Yes my friends, it was a ya ba daba do moment. My name is Lois, and I am a fruity pebble addict. This is where you should all say, Hi Lois,,,, IM WAITING !!!!! Fine dont support me, I will get over it,,,, in due time.

I flew open the car door before Trevor had made a complete stop, forgot my seatbelt was still on and for a brief second, had a jesus take the wheel moment. Through the parking lot I trotted singing flintstones, meet the flintstones, leaving poor little Trevi in my dust. He finally caught up to me in time to catch my purse as I threw it near the closest cart, hoping it would land in there. Up and down the isles I raced, nearly taking out two bluehaired ladies in my quest to find the modern stone age family. I knew I had to be getting closer because I could smell the aromatic scent of my beloved fruity pebbles, and oh sweet mary magdeline did I ever. Actually, for the record I have to admit it was Trevor who found them, well a distant cousin to the brand name but a much larger bag, a 2 pound bag I may add for over 2 dollars cheaper then an actual box of the real deal, seen in the picture above, I grabbed a bag, my little fingers itching to just grab one more for good measure, Trevor must have noticed my desire, because he said for that price you might as well get another bag, WHOO BABY, that landed him a big ole smack on the yap, I bet if he had of known 2 bags of fruity pebbles would cause a kiss like that he would have told me to get as many as my little belly desired.

 To the checkouts we went, and I must admit I did feel a little foolish slamming my bags of cereal on the conveyer belt, you see we also bought a 2lb bag of knock off berry capt crunch and a 2 lb bag of chocolatley pebbles, ( Trevor picked those not me !!! ), So I felt I should explain myself to the young cashier with hair dyed so orange she rather resembled casey from mr dressup.

Mr Dressup, I told you not to buy me Herbal Essence Hair Dye

I quickly explained to her that we cant get fruity pebbles in Canada, she then went on to tell me with the most concerned voice heard only in bad soap operas, that they have discontinued making herbal essence hair dye, her favorite brand, well honey if your hair is any indication of what that hair dye does, PRAISE JESUS, they decided to save other helpless victims was what I was thinking to myself, self for once actually agreed with me.

My mission complete I was now ready to come back to Canada, home of damn cold winters, mosquitos as big as hummingbirds in the summer and our beloved national symbol, the beaver. But not before I reenacted my Ikea commercial of the woman coming out of the store with all of her bags yelling, START THE CARRRRRRRRRR, after all I wanted the americans to know Canadians are also known for their sense of humor, as well as snow, mosquitos and beavers. 

 On the way home my belly took to grumbling so bad it sounded like distant thunder, I later found out it was the KFC I had for lunch trying to make its escape, by the time I got back home I was one fart away from blowing a hole in my drawers. After a day filled with my singing for an hour and a half, racing through isles nearly knocking over blue haired ladies on their quick trip to walley world before bingo and faining deep concern for the casey look alike, I was ready to settle down and have a delicious bowl of my bounty, I was shaking so badly I could barely pour it into the bowl, but after a few deep breaths I was able to achieve what I drove an hour and a half for, yup you guessed it, FRUITY PEBBLES.

Trevor, on the other hand was ready for a much needed nap after that trip and I am almost positive I heard him humming the tune of , its alright to be a redneck as he went up the stairs, I on the other hand, was so happy I could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust, my cousin Peggy told me not to each to much of that colorful cereal or I would be shitting rainbows, I told her it was a risk worth taking. 

 I hope you all find something in your life that gives you as much joy and happiness that you to can say, "I'm so happy, I could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust"

A Nannies Love

Hello and welcome back:

 Today is Valentines day,but for me its also a day filled with reflection, great memories and a sense of sadness. 13 years ago today we lost our beloved grandmother, the woman we all loved and held with high reguard and often times got great advice as well as love and laughter. So get comfy, get your favorite beverage of choice and come join me on a journey of a nannies love.   

 Our grandmother, my fathers mother lived with us, it was supposed to be for a month, and as the legend tells it, 30 years later she was still with us. She was the nannie every little girl dreams about, fluffy and soft, smelling of chantilly lace perfume and dumaurier king sized cigarettes. Always there with a hug and usually packing candy to go with those soft,  never ending chantilly lace/dumaurier king sized cigarettes hugs. Nan had a birthmark that took up one whole side of her face, I asked her once what it was, she responded, an angel gave me a kiss and that is her lipstick . It made me feel proud to know that the angel thought my nannie was as special as I did and it also made me a little afraid of lipstick, until the teenage years. 

 Nannie had spunk to put it lightly, she got up every morning at 8am, shuffled out to the kitchen and made the same breakfast every morning, toast, corn flakes, half a grapefruit and a cup of tea. From there she would get ready for her daily trip on the city bus to the mall, and hell hath no fury if you were sitting in "her seat" because she would on no uncertain terms tell you "thats my seat,,,, get out.  All the bus drivers knew her, some loved her, others not. But when my uncle passed away, all of those bus drivers one by one streamed into the funeral home and offered her their condolences, my nan never forgot that , looking back I dont think any of us did. I guess it was their way of giving thanks to the white haired lady with spunk who travelled on their buses on a daily basis. 

My nan had funny ways about her , she would ask you what the weather was like and no sooner would you tell her what it was doing outside, she would open the door, stick her hand out and promply tell you the weather conditions better then any meterologist ever could. She also had a passion for game shows, she would holler her answers at the tv as if the people inside the tv could magically hear her, and godforbid if they didnt listen because she would then yell, YOU STUPID ASS. Wheel of fourtune jeopardy , the price is right and press your luck were her favorites, it never failed to make me laugh when she would yell big bucks no whammies no whammies.  I think of my nan often as I watch wheel of fortune and I smile when I find myself yelling, you stupid ass. I also smile everytime I think of my grandmother yelling "your old ass" when someone told her something she didnt want to believe. My son Austin used that very line on my mother one day, mom said the hair stood up on the back of her neck thinking nannie was back to live another 30 years with her. Austin was just little when Nan passed away and to my knowledge never heard her say those words, guess Nan was watching over him giving him her classic line.

 Growing up with a nannie who lived with you had its perks, being the youngest of 9 kids I knew that all too well. She used to call me tiddlywinks, and in her eyes her little tiddlywinks could do no wrong. Everyday afterschool I would race home to see what special treat she would leave me in her little basket on her dresser, usually it was a piece of candy but sometimes I would hit the motherload, BON BONS, little coconut delights covered in a hardshell sugary candy, it was every little girlsdream and desire to come home and find those little beauties , she would also leave me little notes telling me not to tell anyone else,,, but I was her favorite, sorry to the rest of my siblings,, the secret is now out, tiddlywinks wins again. 

Other perks were coming home on wednesdays when in elementary school I only had to go until noon. I would arrive home to a feast of a mini chicken pot pie or mini pizza and a class of her sussex gingerale,found only in the maritime provinces. Together we would eat our lunch, sip away at our gingerale and yell at stupid contestents on game shows.  She also had a book that she would read to me, if I close my eyes I can still hear her husky voice read about Johnny being bad and throwing a rock at his grandmothers goose. She left me that book and inside she wrote, to my dear Loisann, I hope someday you will have children of your own that you can read "The old Goose" to and think of me when you do, all my love , nannie. I did as she wished, I had kids of my own and often read them that story, often times having to pause to clear my throat that got clogged with tears for my nannie.

 Nannie not only loved her grandkids, she also loved her great grandchildren, Adam, Peter, Courteney and Emily ,her first of many great grandchildren became fixtures in her life as well as her heart, they would come into the house running to see nannie, or as Peter called her , nannie dewheeze, instead of nannie Louise. She loved cantelope melon and she and Peter used to share it. Although the first time we realized Peter enjoyed the melon was when he was quite young and got around by means of a walker, that kid was like greased lightening in that thing, one minute he would be beside you the next you would hear the wheels and see a flash of red, as his little redhead would be off on another grand adventure of lets see where and what I can get into with this contraption, (thankfully due to to safety issues they stopped making them in the late 90s). Nannie was sitting at the table with us eating away on her melon wedge, when all of a sudden we heard the most ungodly sound, slurping and smacking, we turned around, and there was our little redheaded boy, whos face was now half covered by the rind of a melon wedge, seems as though Peter was dumpster diving into the garbage can and decided nannie dewheezes melon looked good. Poor nan was horrifed, she jumped up got out a new melon and diced it up for him , imagine her baby eating from a garbage. Good news is, Peter is now 25 and the dumpster diving incident didnt harm him. Hes alive and well and now a chef, I wonder if he still likes melon.

 Nannie also had funny little sayings or do funny things. Some examples are, right after eating she would begin tapping her fingernails on the table humming, hmm hmm hmm, mom would look up from her meal and say deserts coming nan, ( the woman loved sweets), from there the tapping and hmm hmm hmming would continue until not only did she get her desert but also her tea. Mom would say, cup of tea nan, Nannie would reply, well if your making it. She also used to come in from outside, turn on every light in the house and then bellow "where was moses when the lights went out" Dad would finally reply, in the goddamn dark saving money on the electricity bill. 

There wasnt anything my nannie couldnt knit or crochette, she made my two older sisters ponchos back in the late 60s early 70's when they were the in thing, and she knit my brother Stephen a green sweater and matching hat, that he lost when the school caught fire. As she got older and her eyes gave her trouble she switched from knitting to search a word books, often times never actually finding the word but circling randoms letters. Nannie loved to play cards and board games, and god strike me dead for saying it but the woman also loved to cheat. Playing snakes and ladders with me when I was 5 SHE CHEATED, her rules stated during her turn that you went up the snakes as well as the ladders, but when it came my turn I had to follow the offical hasboro game rules of you land on a snake you went down the snake, I never minded, we played that game for hours. She loved 45's as well and legend has it that she was quite good at slipping a card up her sleeve a time or two. But for every gambling sin she had she got aboslution from every sunday at churh and even in the lords house she had her own seat, and the devil bedamned if you happened to be sitting there.

 My nannie also gave advice, most of the time it worked in our favor, for my brother stephen one time her advice was helpful although left him with a burning sensation. You see, Studly aka stephen got a terrible case of the roids, so bad infact that he was supposed to have surgery. Upon hearing this, my grandmother said surgery bedamned, what you do is put some vicks vapor rub on those hemmoroids, it will clear them right up. The woman at this point was in her 80's a legend of her time, she was old, she knew all the rememdies so Stephen did what she said. Even though the poor man nearly cleared the roof at first impact of the vicks vapor rub hitting his arse, the good news is he never needed that surgery and til this day I dont think has ever had a reoccurence of the roids again. Moral of the story is listen to the old folks, they know what they are talking about, and you never need a weatherman to tell you what to expect, if an older person says it must be going to rain because their knees are cracking, chances are good that within the next 12 hours you will get rain.

 My grandmother lead a rich life, not in the way of money, but with love, laughter and faith. She married the love of her life and had 3 kids, and went on to have many great grandkids whom she loved like there was no tomorrow. Sadly with age her memory started fading, she no longer knew who we were often times calling me her daughters name, I was no longer tiddlywinks, but deep down I knew, I would forever be that little girl she read the old goose story to, the one who would watch gameshows and sip ice cold gingerale with and I would always be her tiddlywinks.  On Valentines day 1998, I awoke to the ringing of the telephone to hear my mom say, Ive got some bad news for you, nannie passed away, at those words, time stood still and I was again that little girl rushing home afterschool to see what special treat was left for me, I was surrounded by that fluffy soft hug and her husky voice telling me she loved her little tiddlywinks best.

Nan was a lover of the gospal songs, she would sit in church and tap her little foot to the music, my sister janet remembering this she laughed because she said she could just see nans little foot tapping away as her favorite hymn played during her service, I was 4 months pregnant with Isaac at the time and during the singing Isaac kept the beat and sadly my bladder felt it as well. After the service, my sister said to the minister I didnt mean to laugh during the service, he said laughter is a good thing, through life and death, its how Nannie would have wanted it.I bet her little feet were keeping time to the music up in heaven as she looked down at us saying arent my grandchildren beautiful to anyone who would listen. She used to have a grandmas brag book which she would fill with all of our pictures and that woman would show it to anyone who would look, to her we were more then grandkids, we were a look into the future, we would be the ones to keep her memories alive as well as make new ones and someday have grandkids of our own, and tell them all about the fiesty grandmother who lived with us and taught us about love, laughter and family.  I miss my nannie terribly, but I know that she is happy now, shes with my grandfather, my father and my uncle, and is watching over us.  Sometimes I get a little whiff of chantilly lace perfume and I smile, because I know nan is around watching her little tiddlywinks all grown up with kids of her own. May you all be blessed with that special grandmother, and may it make you all so happy you to can say "I'm so happy I could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust"

Kitty Cat Bliss And Mama Is Pissed

Hello and welcome back:

 First blog of 2011 and we are already into February, what the hell happened you asked, well sit back get comfy and grab your drink of choice and come join me on an epic tale of Kitty cat bliss and mama is pissed. 

One thing I learned in college was there are no guarentees in life and especially in animal medicine, point taken I got that part, but no where and I do mean no where was I taught that at some point in your career of being a technician will some little creature tug on your heartstrings so badly that you feel your life and family just wont be complete until they are forever in your heart as well as your home, now enters Miss Ella Blue, a gorgeous steel gray long haired tabby cat that did indeed do all of those things mentioned above. I knew nothing about her life as I prepped her for surgery, I knew nothing of her life as I kept a close eye on her stats as she was under the knife, nor did I know anything of her life as I held her in my arms as she woke up, yawned and looked into my eyes, what I did know at that point was, she was beautiful !!!  

 The next day I was told her owner was there to take her home, little did I know that this woman is a close friend of the vet I work for and she brought the cat into be spayed because someone dropped her off at her home because for some reason they didnt see the beauty that I did. The woman realized that the cat and I were like contestants on the chuck wollery game show "the love connection" she explained the case to me and said if you want her you can have her. I looked around to see if there were any other technicians around me, could she possibly be talking to me ?? To my relief she was , I never hesitated and said I would love to give her a home.  Long story short, I never thought at this point to even attempt to call Trevor at work to clear it with him, the little voice in my head said, remember what he always says, "What my baby wants, my baby gets" well his baby wanted this cat and guess what, his baby got her. I told him later that night when he called home, he wasnt upset, just a little concerned about what Moses would do. To say that Moses saw little hearts floating above his head when Ella first came home would be wrong, instead he saw red and took every oppertunity to show me he wasnt impressed, mostly with more ambushes then normal and  yacking up furballs in my slippers.

Moses and Ella still are not friends although Moses is trying, Ella is having nothing of it. She and Spirit get along quite well, and when the other two are staring each other down making noises that Im sure are only heard in really bad 70's pornos, Spirit sits on his butt in the middle of them and puts his little paws in the air like he is Rodney King saying cant we all just get along, sadly neither cat listens to Spirit aka Rodney and continues the porno talk and staring down. It will get better is what I keep telling myself and self replies thats right girlfriend think positive and pour yourself another shot of fireball. Come to find out, Self is a very smart person, who knew?

 A heartfelt story isnt it, but if you know my animals then you know they have done something by now to put a hitch in this little redheads giddyup, and you would be correct in that assumption, so refresh your drinks and join me now for the continuing story of kittycat bliss and mama is pissed. 

 Trevor is a very smart man, but like every other human in this world sometimes he doesnt always make great choices and this part of my blog entry is a classic example ,,, the damn fool bought cat nip !!!! Sure they say its all natural but I still say its like weed for cats, or at least in Moses case it turned out to be. His eyes got big as saucers, he flew up in the air, landed none to gracefully on the clothes hamper and then as though in slow motion fell from that did a flip through the air and landed on his feet with a look on his face as if to say, LETS DO THAT AGAIN. 

From there he rolled around on his back with his feet in the air and I swear to god he was laughing, either that or he was yacking up a furball, he sniffed some more and did a few more leaps of faith and then,,,, he got the munchies, the damn cat ate half a bowl of kibble and then sniffed the dogs ass to see if he was packing anything tasty, Maverick had a look of fear and promply sat down, sadly on the cats head.  I made Trevor put up the catnip and also made him promise me that not only was it securely closed but also put away, oh yes hun it is he replies. 

Two nights later when Trevor is back in Moncton leaving me faced with this feeling of this queen sized bed is to damn big without him snuggled beside me and that bitch named insomnia is yet again making her presence known.  After flipping , flopping and turning my pillow over to the cool side for the 50th time that night I finally doze off only to be awaked by an animal running through the house, jumping, leaping, meowing and running up and down the stairs so fast it sounded like a herd of horny elephants. I tell Spirit to stop it and go to sleep, only to roll over and come face to face with Spirit !!!  It was Moses making all the noise, a storm must be coming I tell myself and again finally drift off to a fitfull sleep.

 At 6:30am the next morning I wake up to the blaring of the alarm, the meowing of cats, the pacing of Maverick doing his I really have to pee dance and one hell of a migrain from not getting enough sleep. I leave the comfort of my warm cozy bed to place my feet onto the cold floor and go rouse the troops and feed the zoo, the whole time complaining to the cats that I could feed them alot faster if they would stop trying to kill me on the stairs. As I round the corner to enter the living room I let out a shriek that I knew had to have reminded the kids to get up and ready for school.

The sight that laid before my eyes looked like a very large bag of weed exploded in our living room. Apparently Trevor not only didnt secure the bag of catnip closed he also didnt lock it up and throw away the key either. It is now Wednesday night and after vacuuming numerous times there is still catnip everywhere and Moses still hasnt completley come down off his cat nip high nor has his case of the munchies subsided any. I guess you could say Moses is so happy he could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust. 

And to you my loyal readers , I hope you to have animals in your life that make you so happy you too can say, "I'm so happy, I could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust"