Moments With Moses

Greetings Infidelssssssssss

  Yes it is me ,, Moses the wonder cat !  I have hijacked the human's blog again as she is running through the house like a mouse with its tail in a trap.

  You see the human has not only a test today, but also a midterm and she is a sight to be seen.  Her hair is a wild mess, and yes she may claim its so wild its almost sexy, but I disagree, it looks like it was caught in that funny looking brush she has , you know the round kind.  She is still in her beloved penguin jammies, God's t shirt ( god never gets to wear his own shirt because she always has it on) and her pink hoodie, and the slippers I so love to yack up my furballs in.  Yes infidels she is a sight for sure. 

  She keeps muttering something about kilo calories, to which I may add Im losing in mass quantities as I type this, you see the human for some reason forgot to fill my dish right to the top , I am feeling rather faint.  To help speed up the feeding process, I knocked my brand new bag of friskies down on the floor, much to my dismay she just picked it back up, gave me a dirty look and said a foul word about a needle is a pretty painless death !!!!  Thankfully God will be home tonight and he will make sure I get fed not only dry kibble in the fun little shapes of fish, but also some human food.  My God is an awesome God !

  The beast is even out of sorts this morning, where the human goes, he follows,  they are both making me dizzy.  She has books from asshole to appetite and I still dont think she really knows how to read, she keeps repeating weird words like kilocalories, mega colon, hepatic lipidosis and some words sound like when I have a furball on its way up.  She has been looking for her pencil for at least 20 minutes now, too bad she cant understand my meows, Ive been trying to tell her IDIOT its behind your ear, and heres another hint sunshine, your glasses would work better if they were on your face and not on the top of your head.  She has her hair in such a state she will be forever finding those puppies.  I have now been awake for 2.5 hours and my food dish is still only half full, how much longer can I go without being fed some nurishment I dont know, but at least I am getting some great laughs out of watching the human.  HA HA she just tripped over the beasts toy, oh no shes livid, she just dropped the F bomb like 3 times, shes holding her foot in the air and hopping around like a one legged dog trying to dig a frozen turd off the ground.

  I cant wait until she goes up on my bed and discovers the clothes she had picked out for today are covered in my fur,,, they may also smell funky, the beast has had bum rumbles for the past 3 days and I think one of his rumbles made it on her favorite pair of jeans.  To make the humans life easier I have just knocked my head against hers to dislodge the "missing pencil" from behind her ear,  holy hell, she just gave me a chin rub and I think is off to fill my dish.  Life is good my infedels life is good. Right about now I guess I can use her line and say "I'm so happy I could shit rainbows and fart fairydust".  May you all be blessed with cats as awesome as me and may you all be so happy , that you to can say Im so happy I could shit rainbows and fart fairy dust"  Or as us cats say, "have a smile on your face like a cat with a strawberry flavoured ass"